Wednesday, July 14, 2010

{Dreams and Ambitions}

How many of you could still remember years back in primary school, when it comes to introduce yourself or writing a composition, your teacher will ask you about your ambition.
Do you still remember your answer you gave that time and is it still the same now?
Come to think about it, the common ambitions of friends back then are teacher and doctor. Definitely there are quite a lot but I cannot think of it now.
For my, back in my times, I noticed that not a lot of them had the same ambition as mine.
My ambition since very young is to become a lawyer.
Of course, I do think of becoming a teacher also. But now, I am only a relief teacher and I could understand it is never easy to handle a whole class. What's worse is that the students now are way too notorious than us last time.
I chose lawyer because I am very vocal, you call it talkative, chatterbox, whatever.
I might not be an eloquent speaker but I always take my hats off when I retaliated back to people's accusation or sarcastic remarks.
Or maybe I still do not know the real reason why I like to be a lawyer in future.
But I am pretty glad that the passion to be a lawyer is still here after soooooo long.
Initially, I was pretty demoralised from the remarks people gave about being a lawyer in Singapore. And of course, my qualification so far.
Only after yesterday, then I realized that there are still hopes.
Now, I am so going to fulfil this ambition. I know that the pursuing of law studies is tedious and on top of that, it is an expensive course but this is my ambition, my passion.

Sometimes, human beings tend to allow their mind to run wild when they are too free. In the sense that they just spend life idling around and you have absolutely no purpose in life.
I believe this applies to me, as well.
Hence I know that I got to do something.
If everything goes out well, of course I would hope to pursue legal studies overseas for degree certification. But one step at a time, what I am looking forward to is to start from basic. That is to take a Diploma in Law.
I had started to look for institutions that is well recognised and it's not really easy after all.

Recently a lot of things happened and my emotions have been going a little out of control. I've no idea why too. Could it be because the hours I am awake is far too much as compare to the hours I am sleeping? Generally, lack of sleep. I am tired quite often but when the night comes, I have difficulty to tug myself in bed. All this behaviours had gotten my sickness to be prolonged. My cough and flu have yet to recover since a week ago.
My reactions got unusually retard today.
While waiting for Jianfeng to be done with his dressing, the nurse called out to me and after many times, then I realized that she was calling me.
In the pharmacy at Jurong polyclinic, I paid the cashier for the item but I forgot to take it until she called for me.
I was buying fries for my mum at LJS, I paid the cashier $50 for the $2.50 fries and I left with the fries and forgot to collect the change. Luckily enough, she called out to me too.
Fish came down and we slacked at the RC. I had no idea why I walked a detour back home while I am supposed to go her way.
And I had mistaken the date for my interview. It's tomorrow and not today. I only realized when I am preparing to head down.
I supposed my soul got out of my body today. Seriously damn retarded today!

Now, I've seen the ugly truth in human.